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Old June 6th, 2007, 04:37 AM   #4
kalindra
 
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Québec, Canada
Posts: 951
Re: Not many scenarios done yet ?

Nice enough, but there is still work to do. I don't know if you uploaded the right ones, but there are some silly details that makes me wonder about the second video.

First : there sems to be something very strange about the caprinys walking in from the edges of the screen. It's maybe just a fraction of a second, but it is still a very unnatural movement. I would have a hard time trying to explain it in details, though.

Second : the loooooong black screen at the end that lasts up to the end of the song. Is it normal ? Then chose a shorter song, because your generic is very very short... or show some "bloopers", something.

Third : The jump in the the story between the "green land" in Episode 1 and the "sand land" in episode 2. How did our 2 Trykers know that they had to get there ? When did they find out that the mother was "kidnapped" ? That's too big of a jump to me. Part of the story seems to have been lost between the two episodes.

I'm not bashing it. I'm just telling you what I noticed that seemed crazy just as you asked. Maybe it's because it isn't the real episode 2 (maybe it is, but how on Atys am I supposed to know ?)

There's also a glimpse of the targetting circle in the beginning of episode 1 (around 1:14 and 1:15) but I haven't noticed it anywhere else, so you did quite a good camera/editing job on that aspect.

The shot with the gingos sleeping almost made those darned hateful doggies look cute. (How can a gingo be cute... I don't even want to think about it )

I just hope you'll continue woking on it, polishing the final result and filming/editing the end of the story. Because it looks like the mother isn't dead yet for sure. And that episode end beside the fire surrounded by the caprynis just isn't a suitable story conclusion. I want to know the rest of it.

Good job, now get back to work.
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